Brittany Cartwright 'Really Thought' She Would Reconcile With Jax Taylor

The Valley star Brittany Cartwright was nearly certain that she and estranged husband Jax Taylor would get back together.

“It has been such a roller-coaster deciding to separate. I really thought that we would be able to get back to a place where we could probably get back together,” Cartwright, 35, exclusively told Us Weekly on Wednesday, September 18, while discussing her partnership with AirSculpt. “I didn’t know for sure, but I really wanted to try everything I possibly could to save my marriage and keep my family together.”

Cartwright and Taylor, 45, started dating in 2015, getting married four years later. The Vanderpump Rules alums, who share 3-year-old son Cruz, separated earlier this year after filming season 1 of The Valley. Cartwright eventually filed for divorce in August. (In her divorce filing, Cartwright listed the pair’s date of separation as January 24.)

“It’s just been a roller-coaster of emotions; a lot of ups [and] a lot of downs, but I also feel like I’ve gotten so much stronger throughout all of this,” Cartwright told Us. “I’m really feeling confident in my decision, and I think that a lot of people are going to be able to relate to everything I’m going through.”

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The Bravo star never pictured herself breaking up with Taylor.

“I did not expect this for myself. I never thought that I would be divorcing him,” Cartwright said on Wednesday. “I always thought we would be together forever. But again, I do feel very confident in my decision and it was not a quick decision for me.”

She added, “I have been separated since January, so this took a lot of courage and a lot of strength for me to actually go through with it. I don’t think that he ever thought that I would go through with it.”

Taylor, for his part, recently concurred that Cartwright’s decision was “right” for their family.

“I’ll always love and care for Brittany. She’s the mother of my beautiful son,” Taylor said on a recent episode of the former couple’s “When Reality Hits” podcast. “All I want for us is to be amicable and even hopefully really, really good friends. One day. I know I’m an amazing father and I know that I will make an excellent ex-husband.”

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For Cartwright, she is focused on “trying to learn this new life” as a single mother.

“My whole life on TV or in L.A. has been with him,” Cartwright told Us on Wednesday. “So it’s a whole new journey for me, even filming-wise and living in L.A. … and being a single mom, it’s all going to be brand-new for me. It’s scary.”

Throughout the separation and divorce, Cartwright has been able to lean on son Cruz, telling Us that the toddler is “thriving.”

“He makes me so happy,” she gushed. “I think I’ve just continued to get even closer to him throughout this whole thing. If I’m having a hard day, we will go jump in the pool or I’ll just give him a big hug. He has been my rock through everything. He’s what keeps me motivated and what keeps me on the right track and knowing that I’m making the right decisions.”

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Cartwright further revealed that coparenting with Taylor “is OK.”

“Jax is a great dad [but] a horrible husband,” she quipped. “I’ll never say that he’s a bad dad or anything like that because he’s not. He would be here for me if I called him or for Cruz in a heartbeat. But things are still very raw between me and Jax now … but he’s listening to my wishes. He’s letting me control. He knows that he has to work on things and work on getting trust and stuff from me again.’

Cartwright is also keen to “get [her] sparkle back,” so she turned to AirSculpt to slim down.

“I’ve been very open and honest about my weight gain and loss and all these different things that I’ve been going through,” Cartwright said. “Even as much weight as I would lose after I had my son, I still wasn’t feeling a hundred percent myself and my body. With AirSculpt, it was able to help give me my shape back and also tighten my skin at the same time. That was something that I was so insecure about that I really, really just wanted to get back to me again and that’s something that was happening immediately.”

She continued, “I could have cried [when I saw the results] because as a mom and how much your body changes, you’re so grateful for everything, but sometimes you just don’t really feel all the way back to yourself.”

With reporting by Christina Garibaldi